Last week I read this story about a man who punched a bear in the face to protect his dog.
After I read the story I thought to myself, “I would totally punch a bear in the face to save Sherman or Leroy. Who wouldn’t?”
That’s so easy to say if you’re NOT actually in the situation.
I mean of course in my mind I think I’m a hero and would do whatever it takes to protect one of my own.
That’s just what mothers do.
Apparently not so in my case because I just about let my dog get eaten be a snake.
It all happened yesterday.
As Mother’s Day was winding down and I was gleaming from all the love that I got, Sherman and I headed out to the garden so that I could plot my garden plans for the summer.
As we walking a snake slithered by and I dropped Sherman’s leash and ran screaming into the garage.
I DROPPED THE LEASH AND RAN AWAY AND LEFT MY DOG BEHIND.
It gets worse.
When I was safely in the garage I peaked out to make sure the snake didn’t follow me.
When I didn’t see the snake chasing me THEN I looked to make Sherman was safe.
He was a little confused as to what was going on, but he was fine.
OMG. What is wrong with me? <—–Did not cross my mind at all.
“Sherman! Come here NOW. I am NOT coming up there to get you.” I yelled in a whisper.
I had to yell in a whisper because I didn’t want the snake to know where I was.
So now, not only did I abandon my dog with a dog/human eating snake, I’m yelling at him in a whisper.
It gets worse.
When he didn’t come to me after I whispered yelled at him, I went in the house to get some treats so that I could bribe him.
So now, I have abandoned my dog with a dog/eating snake, yelled at him and completely and totally left him outside to fend for himself.
As I run in the house I encounter Bobby and he asks me what I’m doing.
“Nothing. I am not doing anything at all.”
I’m not going to tell him what I’ve done.
I would never live that down.
So now…….I can add lying to my son on the list.
I go back out to my safe spot in the garage, but not before checking to make sure the snake hasn’t slithered down, and whisper yell at Sherman again.
“Get down here NOW Sherman. I have COOKIES.” and I waved the cookies in the air.
Finally, after what seemed like eternity, (because he was totally confused) Sherman joined me in the garage to get his cookies.
Thank God we both survived.
I DON’T DO SNAKES.
Not even the garter snakes that visit us EVERY SINGLE Spring.
I will let them eat my dogs and my kids before I get anywhere near them.
Mother of The Year Award goes right here.
p.s. Thank you to everyone for the advice on Leroy’s ears! They remain the same and my husband says thanks a lot for NOT being on his side 😉
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