10 Sensible House Cleaning Tips For Living With Newfoundlands

If you’re lucky enough to be owned by Newfoundlands, you already know that they drool a lot and shed all day long. 

They’re attracted to mud, they love water and their double coat is a magnet for sticks, burrs, leaves and every other type of debris imaginable. 

Their favorite season of all time, besides winter, is mud season. 

Newfies are messy but they are worth every drool string that they leave on the ceiling + more. 

First-time Newfie owners are always looking for house cleaning tips, especially when their Newfie outgrows the cute puppy stage and they’re knee dip in the adolescent era. 

Here are some of our best, and realistic, house-cleaning tips for living with Newfoundlands:

 

Clean Houses Are Overrated

First, we need to face reality, this is your life now and the quicker you accept that, the better off you’re going to be.

Newfies shed daily and they blow coat twice a year. 

When they blow coat it’s like a fur bomb went off. 

Your house will NEVER be dog hair free, even if you vacuum and sweep daily. 

Dog hair tumbleweeds are now a permanent part of your decor.

Other than sweep the fur balls under your couch, there’s nothing you can do to stop them from appearing. 

As soon as you vacuum, one will be floating through the air looking for the perfect place to land. 

Cleaning With Newfoundlands

If your Newfie is inside the house while you’re cleaning, they’ll be with you every step of the way.

Cleaning with Newfoundlands is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos with some added dog hair stuck in your toothbrush. 

Newfies like to Newfervise every project and task that their owners do in order to make sure that it’s being performed the correct way. 

They’ll lay or sit in the worst possible spot which means you then have to clean around their furry potato sack body. 

Then they will carefully inspect what you did usually by breathing hot air on the glass and launching their body up on furniture to see if you did in fact remove their hair glitter. 

Don’t worry, you didn’t. 

Clean floors? For a split second maybe. 

Ok, you get the drift now let’s get down to the specifics.

Textured Paint

Even if textured paint isn’t your vibe, it is now. 

You will never be able to paint a room without multiple dog hairs getting stuck in the paint. 

No matter how much you clean before you paint, there will always be stray hairs in the paint or on the wall. 

Don’t fight it, work with it. 

Dog hair paint is your only option now.

You Live With An Artist

Newfies are notorious for being gifted nose and slobber artists.

They leave their abstract art all over the house and it’s just plain rude to continue to wipe it away every day. 

Embrace the dried drool running down your window panes and doors. 

Leave that dried slobber delicately hanging from the ceiling, it was flung there with intent.

Clean Floors

Oh, you want to have shiny floors again?

Shiny floors are overrated and kind of dangerous when you think about it.

You need that extra layer of mud resting on top of your floor to give you and your Newfie some traction. 

It’s a DIY non-slip floor cover. 

Your floors are forever wet and dirty now, it’s ok. 

Oh, and you probably have some type of sticky goop stuck on your floors because you were trying to find the best way to keep those rugs from slipping out under your dog’s feet. (I hope that’s not just me. I’ll get around to scraping it off one of these days.)

Best Dog Hair Cleaning Gadgets

There are hundreds of cleaning gadgets on the market that target dog hair and you’ll invest in them because, at this point, you’re desperate.

New vacuums, mops, brooms, lint rollers, pet hair removal tools, cleaning solutions, drool erasers, fabric sheets…etc.

You have an embarrassing amount of these cleaning gadgets that have given you their word of honor that they’ll make your life easier but they won’t, ok?

They won’t make your life easier because NO gadget can keep up with Newfies. 

Dog Free Furniture

You’re joking, right?

Even if you decide to not allow your Newfoundland on the couch, chair or bed, there’s still going to be dog hair on it. 

It’s attached to you, it’s drifting through the hair it’s a part of your DNA now. 

You can try to remove dog hair from your couch but as soon as you turn around, a few more hairs will magically appear out of thin air. 

Throw a sheet over that furniture and forget about it. 

Best Vacuum For Massive Amounts Of Dog Hair

Oh honey, are you still searching for a vacuum cleaner that can handle the amount of dog hair that your Newfies sprinkle all over?

I’m so sorry to have to be the one to tell you that this type of vacuum cleaner doesn’t exist. 

You can tell that whoever designs these “pet vacuum” cleaners has never lived with a Newf.

They work great for the first week, maybe the first month if you’re lucky but they quickly drown in dog hair, dander and dust.

Save your money and buy a new vacuum cleaner every other year. 

Clean Walls

Regardless of how much dog hair “texture” is under your paint, you’ll have to consider cleaning the dried drool off the walls and ceilings but there’s also the Newfie grime. 

In case you’re not familiar with that yet, the Newfie grime is the oily residue that rubs off their coat when they lay or rub up against the wall. 

It’s way harder to get off the walls and furniture than just plain old dried drool. 

You need to put some muscle into scrubbing that grime off. 

The other option would be to paint your walls a grimy grey so the oils blend right in and no one will ever know unless they touch it. 

Not only is there Newfie grime but also abstract mud splatters on the walls from the sponges that are your Newfie’s paws. 

Annnnnnddddd, let’s not forget the Newfie that plasters their body right up to the wall and then rolls over and scratches the paint off the wall with their hooves. 

Accent Furniture

Do you know how some people have cute little end tables with pretty trinkets?

That’s not you anymore. 

Put that breakable stuff away or sell it on the marketplace and use the extra money for non-slip rugs. 

A Newfie’s tail is an untamed sweeper and is going to take all of those trinkets out at the same time. 

You’re cute room accessories are now THE NEWFIE, drool towels, a giant dog bed that your Newfie doesn’t use, cooling pads, elevated bowls, large dog toys, a box fan, a dog brush and probably some type of Newfie statue. 

On the plus side, you don’t need to worry about matching couches and chairs because they’re now covered with sheets. 

Clean Windows

You know how they have those window coverings that you can buy to keep people from seeing inside your house or to block out the sun?

No need to waste your money on those, a nice film of dog drool works great and the more drool, the better the protection. 

Any type of window that a Newf can reach will have an opaque film. 

Your drapes will quickly have dried slobber and dog hair stuck to them and those wooden window sills don’t stand a chance. 

Keeping a clean house when you’re owned by Newfies is a challenge and sometimes you just have to accept defeat. 

When you’re owned by a Newf, you’re changing your lifestyle which includes the way you lived BN (Before Newfies)

It’s a messy life but it’s a good life. 

p.s. If you’re allergeric to dogs, we should probably meet at your house.

p.p.s. If you’re allergeric to dogs, you’re probably allergeric to me. 

 

 

 

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